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Dick Larkin, The Commando
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The Commando News
Small Business Marketing . . . Commando Style
May 2007
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Dear Reader,

I've had to do some real work (gasp!) for a few weeks, but hope to get
back to slacking off and returning to the publishing schedule very soon.

This week's Commando covers a marketing lesson I learned from His
Holiness, the Dali Lama.

Enjoy,
YPCommando LogoDick Larkin


 
The Dali Lama's one and only item
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Dali Llama

I was standing in the checkout line at Costco last Saturday when out of the corner of my eye, I recognized a celebrity standing in front of me. 


He stood there in a navy blue Adidas running suit instead of his orange tunic, but I recognized that famous face. 

 

I was standing next to the Dali Lama !

 

Two questions immediately popped into my head.

 

1.  Why was his holiness, the Dali Lama, the spiritual leader of Tibet, and the voice of freedom for millions shopping at the Carlsbad, California Costco?

 

 And

 

2.  Why did he only have one item in his cart?

 

I mean, c'mon.  Who goes to Costco and buys only one item?

 

Granted, it was a 42" high def plasma television set, but still. 

 

One item?

 

Costco caters to people who buy lots of stuff, not just one item.

 

They require you to have a $35 membership card just to get in their cavernous stores.


Their shopping carts are the size of Buicks.


They have no express lanes (like the grocery stores).  Every shopper queues up like cattle regardless if they have one item, like the Dali Lama, or if they have five skids of soft drinks, 100 pounds of peanut butter and a set of radial tires.

 

Costco knows that they can't be all things to all people, so they go after a certain clientele: people who want to save money on high quality merchandise and are willing to pay a premium for the privilege. 

 

It must be working, because their parking lots are jammed full of Mercedes, BMWs, Hummers and other expensive vehicles of their well-heeled and spiritually enlightened customers.

 

So where's the marketing lesson for your small business?

 

Focus on your best customers and forget the rest.

 

If you focus your marketing message on the 20% of customers who deliver the highest profits, you can eliminate the 80% customers who suck up time, energy and money.


Look at your website.  Does it clearly define the clients you wish to reach?


One maid service that is a client of ours shows a photo of a soccer mom with the caption, "Who has time to clean house? . . . we do!"


This maid service knows that the soccer moms are their prime customers.  They ignore everyone who falls outside this demographic group.

 

So back to the Dali Lama.

 

I mustered up the nerve to ask him for his autograph.  He politely informed me that I had a case of mistaken identity.

 

Not only wasn't he the holiest Tibetan monk of our lifetime, but he wasn't even Tibetan, or a monk for that matter.  

 

His name was Juan.

(dang) 

Well, I suppose that the path to enlightenment is not paved with 42" plasma televisions as I had hoped.


But now I am at peace with Costco's decision not to have express checkout lanes. 

 

So I got that goin' for me . . . which is nice.

 
Last Newsletter's Redneck Riddle Answer
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An easy way to tell the difference between rednecks and hillbillies is the way they eat their rice.

Hillbillies eat rice covered with brown gravy. Rednecks eat their rice with red beans.

It's a cultural thing.

That brings us to today's Redneck Riddle.

Why do Chinese men eat more rice than Japanese men?

Check out the answer and see who won a lifetime supply* of Starbuck's Coffee

http://ypcommando.com/brain/64a.html#a
 
 
My Little Inkers
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Suddenly, those violent video games don't seem so bad.

Want to keep up on local online marketing?   Check out the Commando Blog.
http://www.ypcommando.com/blog/
 
Location, location, location
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You don't suppose these shops are owned by the same guy, do you?
 
How do I love thee?  Let me count the ways.
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The secret of a lasting relationship is saying "I love you."



 
Who would you like?
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I'm lining up talent for the next round of webcasts in the Pimp My Marketing Webinar Series.  I'm particularly looking for individuals who have demonstrated success helping small businesses market using the Internet.

If you have a suggestion, send me a note.  Dick@commandos.cc
 
 
If the shock doesn't kill him, the fall probably will 
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Darwinism in action.
 
 
Signs we like
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Wow, it's good thing they put up that sign.
 
 
This week's Redneck Riddle
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Buford works with his 20 cousins in the same factory.


They all drive from various directions (north, south, east and west) to get to work.


One day, the boss informed the staff that the factory would be relocating to another location.


Everyone was worried that their commute would be longer.


The boss assured everyone that no matter which direction they came from, they would all have a shorter commute than they had to the previous location.


How is it possible that all employees could have a shorter commute and continue working together at the new location?


Email your answer to move@redneckriddles.com.  One lucky winner will receive a lifetime supply* of Starbucks coffee.



*It's a lifetime provided that you stop drinking after the third cup or so, because it's a $10 Starbucks gift card. 
 
So, what do you really do?
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People often ask me what I really do for a living.

As lucrative as it may appear to publish a free newsletter, my work focuses entirely on helping businesses leverage the Internet to attract local customers.

We've developed several highly effective technologies that are producing outstanding results.

If you have a business serving the San Diego area and this sounds interesting, we should talk.

If you're not in the San Diego area and you're dying to know more about ways to use the Internet more effectively, drop me a line.

tellmemore@dicklarkin.com
 
Quote of the Day
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"And all this time I thought that Googling yourself meant that other thing."

 - Marge Simpson

 
Quick Links...
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Contact Information
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phone: 760-918-1723
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I've been bragging about Kerry Randall's book on Yellow Pages Advertising for Lawyers as being simply the best book I've read for Yellow Pages advertisers. The problem was that it was targeted toward lawyers and didn't address other business types.

Wisely, Kerry updated the wonderful tips and marketing plans for any business that advertises in the Yellow Pages.

He sent me a copy for review, and I liked it so much that I bought the exclusive rights to market the electronic version.

His book is loaded with very specific examples and exercises that are easy to follow. I can honestly say that every advertiser (even a guy with a little in-column ad) will benefit by reading this book.

I've seen, and even promoted other very good YP books that sell for $50 - $150, but nothing cuts to the chase like Winning the Yellow Pages War. Kerry focuses on the critical issues that will have the biggest impact. He uses solid examples and shows ads created using his techniques.

I'm selling copies of Winning the Yellow Pages War for only $14.99. That price is far too little for the value the book contains.

However, my mission as the Yellow Pages Commando has always been to help more people be successful with their Yellow Pages advertising rather than to get rich off a few that can afford a higher price.
Make payments withPayPal - it's fast, free and secure!

I'll email the book to you as a PDF document that can be read and printed using the free Adobe Acrobat reader.

I offer a 100% money back guarantee if you are not completely satisfied with your investment. You have nothing to lose.

© 2005 Dick Larkin. All rights reserved.
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