April 26, 2005
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-- Which plumber would YOU really call?
-- Answer to Last Week's Redneck Riddle™
-- There goes another
-- Jacques Cousteau's cat?
-- Thinning the herd
-- Close to home
-- It was beer all along . . .
-- It says so right here . . .
-- This Week's Redneck Riddle™
-- Quote of the Week

Your opinion is extremely valuable, and I'm willing to reward you handsomely for it.

Which plumber would YOU really call?
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I invited my readers to design the World's Best Yellow Pages Ad for a real plumbing contractor in West Los Angeles.

Now, it's your turn to pick the winner.

Rules:

1. Look at ALL of the Yellow Pages Ads below. Click any image to see a larger version.
   
   
2. Decide which plumber you would call first, second and third.
   
   
3. I'm particularly interested in your reasons for selecting a particular one; and why you didn't select another. Please be as frank as possible.
   
   It would be helpful if you included your age and gender (I won't publish that information with your name).
   
   
4. Email your selection to dlarkin@gmail.com
   
   
5. When the contest is over, I will prepare a comprehensive report including the Yellow Pages Ads, comments, analysis and research data on why some were more effective than others. I'll send a free copy to everyone who voted. People who didn't vote can purchase the report for $500.
   
   
6. Voting ends May 31, 2005. I'll email everyone the complete report and I'll even include the Yellow Pages Commando News. I will never share your email or personal information with anyone else.
   
   
7. As a special bonus, one voter will be randomly selected to win an iPod Shuffle. How cool is that?

Ads are shown in the order in which they were received.

Ad #001	Ad #002
Click any image to see larger version.
Ad #003	Ad #004
Ad #005	Ad #006
Ad #007	Ad #008
Ad #009	Ad #010
Ad #011	Ad #012
Ad #013	Ad #014
Ad #015	Ad #016
Click ad to see larger version.
Ad #017	Ad #018
Ad #019	Ad #020
Ad #021	Ad #022
Ad #023	Ad #024
Ad #025	Ad #026
Ad #027	Ad #028
Ad #029	Ad #030
Ad #031	Ad #032
Ad #033	Ad #034
Ad #035	Ad #036
Ad #037	Ad #038

Which plumber would YOU call first, second, and third? Why?

Background . . .

Paul Venya, owner of TV Plumbing in Santa Monica, called me asking for advice on making the Yellow Pages work for him.

Rather than do any actual work myself, I thought that it would be fun to have a contest and give a couple of iPod Shuffles to the winners selected by my readers.

Paul sent this horrible display that had been prepared by his YP rep.


Click Image to see full size version.

I thought that it would be fun to have a contest to see who could design the best full page display for him. Using my questionnaire for Plumbing Contractors, he indicated what he would want customers to know about him.

Read the Contest Rules and Entry Information

Which plumber would YOU call first, second, and third? Why?

Answer to Last Week's Redneck Riddle™
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Buford's Home	Clinton Library
Special thanks to Mike Schilling of Valley Yellow Pages for pointing out this amazing coincidence.

Buford, Festus, Mabel and Big Bertha each live in a house trailer. Their trailers are arranged in a row numbered 1 to 4 from left to right. Also, one of them is the trailer park manager.

1. If Mabel's trailer is not next to Festus's trailer, then the trailer park manager is Buford and lives in trailer 1.

2. If Buford's trailer is right of Mabel's trailer, then the trailer park manager is Big Bertha and lives in trailer 4.

3. If Festus's trailer is not next to Big Bertha's trailer, then the trailer park manager is Mabel and lives in trailer 3.

4. If Big Bertha's trailer is right of Buford's trailer, then the trailer park manager is Festus and lives in trailer 2.

Who is the trailer park manager?

See the Answer & the Celebrity Winner of Win the Yellow Pages War

There goes another
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You never know where you'll find fans of the YP Commando News.

Jacques Cousteau's cat?
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Mmmmm . . . . tastes fishy!

Thinning the herd
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Ooo . . . this looks dangerous.

He should wear a helmet.

Close to home
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In the sixties, we protested issues affecting the globe.

Now, we're concerned with issues much closer to home.

It was beer all along . . .
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I finally cracked the DaVinci Code.

It says so right here . . .
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Nah. I seriously doubt it.

This Week's Redneck Riddle™
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Buford T. Dingleberry's age is three years more than three times his son's age. Around the trailer park, they're know as "Big Fart" and "Little Fart".

After three years, Buford's age will be ten years more than twice his son's age.

What is Buford T. Dingleberry's present age?

Email your answer to puzzler@dicklarkin.com

The winner will receive 15 minutes of uninterrupted fame.

I'll also select one winner to receive a paperback version of "Win the Yellow Pages War" by Kerry Randall. I only have a couple of the bound versions, but I offer the eBook on my YPcommando.com web site.

To improve your random chances of winning, please include your name and company name.

I draw the winner the day before I send the following newsletter, so keep voting until the polls close.

Loads of Yellow Pages Items in the YP Store

Quote of the Week
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When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it. --Henry Ford